I've found a new weight loss plan! Don't call Jenny Craig or any of those bitches. Go to jail!
20-year-old Broderick Lloyd Laswell is in jail and has been for the past 8 months. When he went in, he said he weighed 413 pounds and is now 308 pounds. Instead of being grateful for losing some lard, he's suing the prison system claiming they are starving his ass.
From his complaint: "On several occasions I have started to do some exercising and my vision went blurry and I felt like I was going to pass out. About an hour after each meal my stomach starts to hurt and growl. I feel hungry again. If we are in a small pod all day do next to nothing for physical exercise we should not lose weight. The only reason we lost weight in here is because we are literally are being starved to death."
That's because you've never exercised before! Before jail, you probably sat your fat ass on your couch eating twinkies and watching Springer. What I want to know is who is he suspected of killing, because he's in the slammer for capital murder charges. Did he sit on a bitch and suffocate them?
The jail captain told The Morning News in Arkansas that they have only served cold meals for years, and they provide at least 3,000 calaries for years. Fat ass also wanted hot meals and claims the biscuits and cakes are too small.
20-year-old Broderick Lloyd Laswell is in jail and has been for the past 8 months. When he went in, he said he weighed 413 pounds and is now 308 pounds. Instead of being grateful for losing some lard, he's suing the prison system claiming they are starving his ass.
From his complaint: "On several occasions I have started to do some exercising and my vision went blurry and I felt like I was going to pass out. About an hour after each meal my stomach starts to hurt and growl. I feel hungry again. If we are in a small pod all day do next to nothing for physical exercise we should not lose weight. The only reason we lost weight in here is because we are literally are being starved to death."
That's because you've never exercised before! Before jail, you probably sat your fat ass on your couch eating twinkies and watching Springer. What I want to know is who is he suspected of killing, because he's in the slammer for capital murder charges. Did he sit on a bitch and suffocate them?
The jail captain told The Morning News in Arkansas that they have only served cold meals for years, and they provide at least 3,000 calaries for years. Fat ass also wanted hot meals and claims the biscuits and cakes are too small.
Listen up, fatty. You are in JAIL. It's not a fucking Vegas buffet! I'm fairly certain you could stand to lose the 100-some-odd pounds. Just be thankful and STFU. Thanks.
Source
No comments:
Post a Comment