Random Acts of Crap

Dannielynn turns two. Geez has it been THAT long??? - I'm Not Obsessed

Kanye West got arrested. I giggled. - DListed

Sir Paul McCartney to wed a third time? Someone needs to quickly show him a picture of the vulture ex-wife and set his ass straight. - Holy Moly

More Batman movie rumors. Since they are still merely rumors, I say "meh." - IDLYITW

Eva Longoria says she's not pregnant, just fat. Seriously, that's what she said. Sometimes these dumbasses do my job for me. - The Superficial

Random Acts of Crap

Chestica Simpson still singing country music and still sucking at it. - IDLYITW

In spite of his claims, P. Diddy Puff Daddy whateverhisnameis does not in fact, own his own private jet. - What Would Tylder Durden Do?

In more Chestica Simpson news, apparently the fans are allowing her to go to Dallas Cowboy games to cheer on her bribed boyfriend Tony Romo on one condition - she not wear a Cowboy's jersey. Goodie. - The Superficial

Is Sam Ronson gonna make Lezzy Lohan an honest lesbian? - DListed

Pamela Anderson says she is absolutely NOT dating Michael Jackson. Thank God for small favors. - Holy Moly

Random Acts of Crap

Christina Aguileria and her boobs went to the VMA's. - The Superficial

Dr. House has a bald spot. Well, he's mostly bald, really. - Daily Mail

Minnie Driver gave birth to a son. I hope like hell the daddy isn't Criss Angel because God knows we don't need another do-rag wearing asshole running around faking building escapes. - The Superficial

Speaking of that douchebag, rumor has it that Holly got sick of waiting on Hugh Hefner to make an honest woman of her and has been cheating on his old ass with Criss Angel. Talk about a downgrade. - Celebitchy

Random Acts of Crap

Chestica Simpson plays the Grand Ole Opry. Country fans still thinks she sucks, and also now thinks she dresses slutty. Well, duh. Just because she changed genres doesn't mean she still isn't gonna air out the ol' funbags. - IDLYITW

How much are the Hulgan's worth? Who cares, they're still all orange freak douchebags. - In Case You Didn't Know

Here's a rundown of the VMA's last night, in case you didn't give a shit. Don't ask me what happened because I didn't actually read any of this. - IDLYITW

Russia hates South Park. Apparently they have no sense of humor. - MollyGood

Twins for Ashlee and Pete Wentzy? - DListed

Random Acts of Crap

Photoshop meets Sarah Palin. Too bad, too. That'd be awesome. - The Superficial

Katherine Heigl frightens innocent puppies. Its true. - IDLYITW

Amy Winehouse requires 48 bottles of Jack Daniels to perform in a concert. That's just an appetizer. - What Would Tyler Durden Do?

Lilly Allen explains her "feud" with Queen Elton. I still say he wins. - DListed

What in Plastic Surgery Hell???

I am assuming this is a rumor. It just has to be. I mean, Pammy Anderson doesn't exactly have the best taste in men, but since she's mother to two young boys, I don't see her dating a [possible] pedophile.

However, the Mirror UK is reporting that she and Michael Jackson have had some sort of secret creepy love affair thing going on. Ew. I'm going to have nightmares for a week for just typing that shit out.

The odd couple seem to have bonded over their love of plastic surgery and have been hooking up in Malibu. We hear the big-boobed babe is a massive fan of Michael... and it seems the feeling is mutual. A source said: "It was all arranged by their people in total secrecy, very cloak and dagger. Michael is such a private person. He gets nervous when he thinks people are following him around, so he chose somewhere neutral for their first date. "They arrived separately at the Shutters Hotel on Malibu Beach so no one would suspect anything and then had a few drinks in the bar." The pair requested a hidden area in the corner - for two reasons. Firstly, it shielded them from any prying eyes. And second, it would have protected them from the dangerous melting effects of the Californian sunshine. After all, there's a fine line between looking hot and having a runny, bubbling face. Our source went on: "They were very chatty. Pamela was being her usual flirty self and Michael seemed to be responding. They are such a strange couple but they seemed to really hit it off." So much so Michael plucked up the courage to ask Pammy out on a second date. And she was more than happy to accept. We're told: "They went for a coffee at Country Mart in Malibu and looked very comfortable with each other. "They chatted about Michael turning 50, his new album, their kids. And he seemed genuinely interested in Pamela."

I know that's a lot to quote. But I'm skeeved out, and couldn't be arsed to read it all myself. I'm going to go soak my brain in bleach now.

Source

Bitchfight!

And you know who won. The QUEEN bitch, Elton John of course. He's been Queen Bitch since before Lilly Allen snorted her first line.

Anywho, Queen B co-hosted the GQ Awards in London with Lilly Allen and he was getting fed up with her drunk ass.

Allen: “And now to the most important part of the night."
Elton: “What? Are you going to have another drink?”

Woo! And apparently she didn't much like his response there, because she had one of her own: “Fuck off Elton. I am 40 years younger than you and have my whole life ahead of me!” Yeah, somehow I doubt he went home and cried into his massive piles of money over that one. To prove my point: “I could still snort you under the table.” Bah! Very true. He could probably snort HER. Seriously. Bitch had a bad habit back in the day. Allen: “Fuck off. I don't know what you are talking about.”

Riiiiiiight. I'm willing to bet my dad's Elton John collection you know exactly what he's talking about. And that's no joke. My dad would kill a bitch for messing with his Elton DVD's. I think he wants to be buried with them, I'm not sure.

Either way, Elton won.

Source

Random Acts of Crap

Harry Potter is not a virgin. Dumbledore would be so disappointed in him. - DListed

Jamie Lynn Spears sends baby gift to Bristol Palin. Quick! Someone tell John McCain! I'll bet he'll need his Depends changed. - The Superficial

Enzyte CEO gets 25 years for fraud. - AVN

Jason Priesley is one hairy bastard. - DListed

Parisite Hilton calls the paps "annoying." As in, "if they're not paying attention to me, they're annoying." - Pink is the New Blog

Christina Aguilera's boobs are still huge. - IDLYITW

Just a Recap

In case you forgot, Amy Winehouse defines the term "one hot mess." Here's a rundown!

She canceled a concert just hours before she was due onstage. Amy Winehouse is facing legal action after she pulled out of a concert in Paris just two hours before she was due to headline it. A statement posted on the festival website said organisers had decided to start legal proceedings against her because of the circumstances of her cancellation. “We have still not been given any explanation of the exact reasons for her absence.”

In the past year, she has OD'd twice. The singer, 24, suffered two major overdoses, with such bad convulsions that they were “like a scene from The Exorcist”. And her body is so frail from drug use that doctors were scared she would break bones during a fit.

And let's not forget, she may have brain damage.

Seriously, how much can one human body take? Or is that it? Is she not human? Because that's the only reason I can think of as to why she's not dead yet. Seriously, this zombie and Courtney Love must both be fucking aliens or something. Nobody can ingest this much heroin and still move among the living.

Source

Random Acts of Crap

This is Sarah Palin's future son-in-law. Says "I'm a fuckin' redneck" who likes hockey, shooting things, and not having kids. Awesome person to have associated with you when you're RUNNING FOR SECOND IN COMMAND of the fucking country. I'm voting democrat and this just cements it, nails down the coffin, and any other cliche you can fucking think of. - The Superficial

Colin Farrell saved a homeless guy. - Mollygood

Kevin Spacey sees a naked dude's ass across his lap, so what does he do? Why he grabs it of course. Hell no, he's not gay! - DListed

Random Acts of Crap

Remember that random cocktail waitress that George Clooney dated? That chick that nobody knew who the fuck she was and had NO career until Clooney started doing her and basically GAVE her said career? She apparently cheated on George. Way to say 'thank you,' nameless cocktail waitress chick. - The Superficial

Lezzy Lohan and her dad the famewhore are still at it via MySpace and the media. - What Would Tyler Durden Do?

Axl Rose wants to fuck Kelly Osbourne. Ew. Poor Kelly. - HolyMoly

Chestica Simpson is still epically failing at country music. - DListed

RIP Del Martin

These ladies got press for being the first lesbian couple to tie the knot in California on June 17th. The lady on the right is Del Martin, and she has passed away. She was 87.

Del and wife Phyllis were the first to form a lesbian rights group, Daughters of Bilitis, in 1955.

Prayers and thoughts go out to Phyllis. Rest in peace, Del! At least they got to finally do what they should be allowed to do as a couple, and marry. Much love and thanks to her for all her hard work over her life.

Source

Random Acts of Crap

Michael Lohan yaps about daughter Lezzy Lohan being "used" by her girlfriend. - IDLYITW

The girlfriend, Sam Ronson, responds via her MySpace blog. Whoo, don't get lezzies pissed! They blog mean. - DListed

Katie-Kate Holmes has huge bruises on her knees. You know those didn't come from doing sexy things with her alien midget husband. - What Would Tyler Durden Do?

Suge Knight arrested for beating up his girlfriend. - The Superficial

Its Pax!

Geez I was starting to wonder if they locked this kid in a basement or something. I don't think we've seen him since they brought him home. He's a cutie though.

Source

Kay McConaughey Proves the Crazy is Genetic

Kay McConaughey, mother to Matthew and another one who named his kid Miller Lyte, proves her kids got the crazy the old fashioned way: genetics. She wrote a book called I Amaze Myself about her life, and let me tell ya, I think she shares smoke with her weirdo kids.

Excerpts:

Having sex with late hubby when he died: “On Monday mornings, he and I often said goodbye by making love. But one day, all of a sudden, it just happened. I knew that something was wrong, because I didn’t hear anything from him. Just nothing But it was just the best way to go!” And when the paramedics showed up, did she cover him up? Heck no. “I was just so proud to show off my big old Jim McConaughey — and his gift."

Ew. On birth of Matthew: “I was deciding, ‘Do I want to have another baby? Do I want to have an affair? Or go back to school? That’s when Matthew was conceived. We had tried for 16 years and no baby. So Matthew was a big surprise!”

That must've been a weird house to grow up in. Either that, or extremely cool. I haven't decided.

Source

Random Acts of Crap

A cabinet punched Kelly Osbourne in the face. - What Would Tylder Durden Do?

Britney Spears is not doing the VMA's this year. - The Superficial

Gas prices need to be brought under control. Not to make life easier on us poor people, but so Diddy can use his private jet again. Oh the humanity: Diddy is flying commercial. Do other passengers fit on the plane with his giant ego? Him and Kanye could never share a plane. - DListed

Why are less women going to church? Its all Buffy the Vampire Slayer's fault. Right. - HolyMoly

Kate Hudson and her hairdresser get sued. - IDLYITW

Random Acts of Crap

Promo shots for the new season of Desperate Housewives are out. Yes I am still watching this crappy show. I cannot help it. You know you watch it too. - DListed

Denise Richards stupid reality show gets the ax. - What Would Tylder Durden Do?

Jenna Jameson finally confirms she's knocked up. Also claims to be "devout Catholic." Stop laughing. - DListed

Charlie Sheen's new wife is already pregnant. - The Superficial

Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale Welcome Second Son

We know Gwen was in hospital on Thursday due to have her baby by C-Section, but I was off Friday so this is late news.


People Magazine says: Zuma Nesta Rock Rossdale was born at 12:46 p.m. and weighed 8 1/2 lbs. He joins the couple's other son Kingston, who turned 2 in May.

"Kingston, Gwen and Gavin Rossdale welcomed the newest member of their family," they say in a statement. "Mother, baby and family are all happy and healthy.

Yeah that's a completely normal name. Way to be, Gavin.

Anywho, congrats to them both. Glad mommy and son are doing well.

Source

Random Acts of Crap

Madonna kicks off her new tour with a vain attempt at controversy. The entire world yawns. - DListed

P Diddy gets pulled over, gets gun pulled on him. However, cops with guns were "really respectful." Awesome. - Mollygood

The Olympics are over. Does that mean we can go one day without hearing something about Michael Phelps now? - DListed

Minnie Driver is really really REALLY pregnant in a bikini. - IDLYITW

Michael Lohan challenges KFed to a boxing match. This could be awesome, no matter who wins. - TheSuperficial

Kim Kardashian cuts her toe. - IDLYITW

Random Acts of Crap

Chestica Simpson wants to sell you beer. - The Superficial

Lezzy Lohan sideboob. - IDLYITW

Lilly Allen is punching people. - What Would Tylder Durden Do?

Gwen Stefani is in the hospital for a scheduled C-Section today. FINALLY. I wondered if they were gonna wait until the kid was in middle school or something. - DListed

Amy Winehouse is NOT going to rehab. Because that is a good idea. - Celebitchy