Birkhead is the Daddy

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm like four days late, but hey, I have a life, y'know. Stop laughing. Seroiusly, it wasn't meant to be funny.

Anyways, DNA came back, and Larry Birkhead is the actual daddy to Dannielynn Hope, Anna Nicole's baby. Thank God, because Howard K. Stern is king of creepy. So the phat check goes to the photog. Woo.

Anna Nicole Smith's Cause of Death Released

In no surprise to anyone whatsoever, it has been released that Anna Nicole Smith died of a combo drug overdose/infection type thing. Nobody offed her, and no aliens zapped her.

According to the medical examiner: "Nine prescription drugs including anti-depressants, anti-anxiety drugs and the sedative chloral hydrate were found in Anna Nicole's blood...On the day of her arrival in Florida on February 5, she complained of chills and was later found to be running a fever at 105 degrees Fahrenheit (40.5 Celsius) caused by the perforation in an abscess in her left buttock, he said. "It is our determination that the cause of death is combined drug toxicity as a result of chloral hydrate and a therapeutic concentration of other medications," said Perper. "A bacterial infection, a viral intestinal infection and possibly flu were contributory causes of death .... We did not find any evidence of homicide..."

And anyways. At least THAT part of the drama can rest in peace.

We Haven't Talked About this Crap in a While!

I haven't done an update on the whole Anna Nicole baby daddy drama because seriously, I was just happy that the poor woman finally got buried. But hey, looks like there's some progress in this mess!

There was a hearing yesterday in the Bahamas to determine paternity of little Dannielynn Hope. Larry Birkhead, Howard K. Stern, Virgie Dramaqueen Arthur, and some random prince all want custody of the baby, with Larry, Howard, and the prince all declaring themselves to be the father. Howard K. Stern was not present for some stupid reason, but the judge declared that Larry, Howard, and the baby undergo DNA testing. There will be another hearing on Tuesday, to listen to DNA experts testify. I dunno if that means they'll have test results then, but that would rule.

I'm still holding out for Larry because Howard gives me the creeps. And Virgie should waddle her fat, gold-digging ass back to Texas. That is all.

Anna Nicole FINALLY Gets a Funeral

The funeral for Anna Nicole was scheduled for today, so of course Virgie Arthur had to famewhore it up a little bit more and filed yet another petition in court, which meant the hearse carrying Anna's body had to stop literally feet from the church where services were being held. The petition was thankfully denied, and Anna should be in the ground shortly.

Seriously, it's not like Anna Nicole is frigging Mother Theresa or anything, but the poor thing didn't deserve this. They couldn't even have an open casket service because she's been dead too long. There's a special place in hell reserved for mothers like Virgie.

FINALLY!

Virgie Arthur, mother to the late Anna Nicole, lost the last-minute petition to the courts to get Anna's body so she could bury it in Texas. The court upheld the previous ruling which would have Anna buried in the Bahamas next to her son, which is what she would have wanted. Virgie will now have to find another way to be an attention whore.

Back to the baby-daddy drama!

Anna Nichole Update

Virgie Arthur, mother to Anna Nicole, recently got to meet baby Dannielynn in the Bahama's where she is staying with creep Howard K. Stern.

A court had ruled that Anna be buried in the Bahama's next to her beloved son, Daniel, but apparently there's another hearing today to see whether that order will be overturned so Virgie can bury Anna in Texas, away from her son. Virgie and Anna had a falling-out years ago, and neither bothered with each other. However, since Anna died, Virgie saw her chance at her 5 minutes in the fucking spotlight and has wallowed her fat ass in it ever since. I hope she loses.

Furthermore, Anna still isn't buried!?!! How long has it been now??!!

Anna Nicole Verdict!

Judge Larry Dramaqueen gave his verdict in who will get custody of Anna Nicole's body, thusly who will get to bury her. Legal guardian to Dannielynn Hope, Richard Milstein, will get the rights. The judge cried when giving his verdict and recommended she be buried next to her son, Daniel, in the Bahamas. Cried??? Oh yeah, that's professional.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Happy Valentine's Day, bitches! I used a picture of George Clooney because he is the ultimate hotness. Him and Trent Reznor are simply the alpha and omega. They make my panties happy.

Anyways, I'm not gonna talk about Anna Nicole today. Or the DRAMA that's all around her people. If you need an update, go to your TV and turn it on. Really. Just about any channel will be yapping about whatever conspiracy theory or random screw has come out of the woodwork regarding the baby's daddy-ness. It's like a bad talk show at this point, people.

Oh and because I just want to have a hotness overload, here's some Trent: